Increase Your Influence at Work With This 5-step Framework

\ To do well at work, you need people on your side. People who trust you, listen to your ideas, value your experience and those who want to help you succeed.

\ Anyone can come up with a great idea, a better solution or different choices to make an optimal decision. The hard part isn’t doing the work, it’s getting buy-in from others.

\ If you can’t sway people in your direction, if you can’t persuade them to see it your way, all the time and effort you have put into something can go to waste. Not getting the alignment you seek can also leave you feeling frustrated, angry and annoyed because once your mind is stuck on a certain possibility, it’s hard to erase it and let it go.

\ Why don’t they get me?

\ Why won’t they listen to me?

\ Why would they choose an inferior option?

\ The ability to influence others is an essential skill to practice and master because the impact you create at work is directly tied to it. Influence not only increases your impact by enabling you to get more done, getting others to support your initiatives and adopt your ideas can build the confidence to try unconventional methods, explore unique possibilities and challenge the status quo.

\ Influence also plays a key role in resolving conflicts, handling negotiations and inspiring others to take action. De-escalating tension, creating win/win situations and uplifting others by encouraging them to take ownership of their responsibilities are highly valued skills that can draw attention from higher-ups and make you stand out at work.

\

Persuasion skills exert a far greater influence over others’ behaviors than formal power structure do.

— Robert B. Cialdini

\ Build your own path to influence using these 5 practices:

State your intentions

When you don’t state your intentions explicitly, others are bound to create a story around it—that’s just how the human mind works.

\

Intentions are invisible. We assume them from other people’s behavior. In other words, we make them up, we invent them. But our invented stories about other people’s intentions are accurate much less often than we think.

— Douglas Stone

\ Intentions play a big role in how your message is received.

If your intent is to prove others wrong, dominate the conversation, draw attention, manipulate or coerce them into seeing things your way, they’re more likely to disregard your opinion. If you’re judgmental, opinionated, or argue and attack their story, they may shut down instead of exploring your point of view.

\ Trying to please others to make them see things your way won’t work too. People won’t buy into your ideas just because you’re nice to them.

\ When you show up with the intent to ask questions, make suggestions, raise concerns, challenge ideas, or find better ways to work together and make decisions, others are more likely to consider your point of view and may even decide to act on it.

\ To influence others, don’t let them play a guessing game—clearly state your intention.

\ For example, you may say:

\ My intent is to ensure we stay competitive in the market. Can we discuss different ways to achieve it?

\ My intent is to find the best possible solution. I want to discuss how we can explore different options before reaching a conclusion.

\ My intent is to get more visibility around my work. Can we discuss how you can enable this for me as a manager?

\ Explicitly stating what you desire from the conversation and why you’re approaching others prevents them from attaching their own meaning. They’re more likely to be curious and open to your point of view once they understand your intent clearly.

\

Intention is one of the most powerful forces there is. What you mean when you do a thing will always determine the outcome. The law creates the world.

― Brenna Yovanoff

\ Don’t try to manipulate, judge, impress or talk down. Don’t try to please people. Use the power of intention to connect and align with others.

Adapt your style

Our ideas are very close to our heart. We believe in them. We are passionate about them. We want others to accept them, applaud them and show the same level of excitement as we can feel internally. But others can’t feel what you’re feeling. They have their own thoughts, ideas and beliefs which matter to them.

\ Knowing what inspires or motivates others can help you connect with them more effectively.

\ What frustrates them?

\ What do they care about?

\ What motivates them?

\ What they need to hear and what will capture their attention?

\ What assumptions have you made about them that may not be true?

\ Do they like to talk about the big picture or need a lot of details?

\ Do they like to stick to data and facts or do they prefer knowing the whole story?

\ Do they like to jump to solutioning or want to dive deep into the problem first?

\ Be eager to learn about those you want to influence so that you can adapt your message and adjust your ideas in a way that appeals to them. Talk in terms of what they want. Focus on what they care about. Take time to ask questions and carefully listen to their answers. One of the best ways to influence people is to make them feel important. Listening with curiosity and with the intent to understand will not only establish that you respect their opinion, but learning about those you want to influence will also paint a clearer picture of what they want enabling you to align on mutually agreeable goals.

\

Clear Communication is vital. You have to simplify things, break it down into easy to understand bites and communicate it as clear as crystal. If people don’t understand your message, you have no hope of persuading them. Be prepared when you begin your attempt to persuade people, it is important that you start from a position of knowing – knowing more than they do about themselves and their surrounding situations.

― Robert Moore

\ Know your audience deeply. Appeal to interest, not intellect. People are driven by what benefits them. Understand what matters to them and position yourself accordingly.

Showcase your value without bragging

Your knowledge, experience and expertise can’t influence others if you keep it all to yourself without promoting yourself and making your work visible. Others don’t know your worth or the value you bring to the table. The less others know about your skills and strengths, the less they’ll be inclined to seek your opinion or take your words seriously when you do speak up. Being an expert in your domain or enthusiasm and motivation about your job can’t make you influential when you lack credibility with your team and others.

\ Building credibility requires showcasing your value and strength. It requires proactively taking steps to ensure your work is recognized and seen. You don’t need to be noisy or brag about your knowledge and skills. Stop hiding and adding value from behind. Make yourself visible by taking the front seat.

1. Don’t wait for others to ask you for guidance and advice. They can’t know that you have something valuable to add if you never speak. Contribute your ideas to discussions, take your turn to speak up without being asked.
2. Instead of limiting your contribution to one task or a certain project, expand your circle of influence by helping others build valuable skills. Passing your skills to others will multiply the impact you create.
3. There are many ways to showcase value and documentation is one of them. By sharing your expertise in writing, you enable others to apply the best practices, make better decisions and prevent them from repeating the same mistakes as you do.
4. Instead of telling others how to solve certain problems, challenge them to think and find their own answers. Promote empowerment, not dependency.

\ You won’t wake up and suddenly become influential one day. Getting others buy-in requires getting them to trust you. Slowly make your way to other people’s hearts by committing to value creation and lifting others up in a way that makes it impossible to ignore you.

\

You own skills, your capabilities, your expertise, your values, your behaviors, your personal energy, your time, your loyalty. You’re the owner of this human capital, and you decide when, how, and where to invest it. You hold the key to value creation. Therefore, create value, preserve that value, and always anticipate value. The journey from success to significance begins with you.

— Benjamin Kofi Quansah

\ People don’t take advice from those they don’t value. When you focus on value creation and building credibility, you’ll slowly be influential in things you say and do. Your words will carry more weightage. You’ll be taken seriously.

Target small wins

Trying to convince others of our big ideas, unconventional methods, or risky strategies is not only overwhelming, not getting the desired response can be downright demotivating and discourage us from even trying.

\ Giant leaps in trying to sway others to our point of view makes accomplishing that thing much harder. It’s like getting one shot at something and either succeeding at it with feelings of pride, fulfilment and high self-worth or failing terribly at it and left feeling embarrassed and humiliated with a sense of low self-esteem. On the one end you’re a hotshot, on the other a loser.

\ When trying to build influence, instead of jumping from a to z, take small steps from b through y. Break down whatever you’re trying to accomplish into small steps. Identify how you can take others with you on this journey from a to z without skipping the steps in between.

\ Celebrate every small win, every victory along this way. Becoming influential doesn’t require major breakthroughs or grand acceptance of ideas. Treat every disagreement and every conflict as an opportunity to learn something new and iterate upon it.

\ You can make a tremendous contribution by influencing others to think right, discuss possibilities and choose the best possible option, even when it doesn’t align with what you suggested at first.

\ Were you able to help others get rid of the bad options from the proposal?

\ Did others acknowledge the risk you called out with the new strategy?

\ Did your pointing out flaws with a certain design sparked a very interesting conversation?

\ These may seem small and insignificant at first, but small wins like these make it possible to navigate and seek alignment on bigger and complex issues in the future.

\

Once a small win has been accomplished, forces are set in motion that favor another small win. Small wins fuel transformative changes by leveraging tiny advantages into patterns that convince people that bigger achievements are within reach.

― Charles Duhigg

\ Don’t give up completely when others don’t see things your way. Start small. Look for the silver lining. Effects of consistent small wins compound over time. Use every small win to remind yourself that bigger and better things are within reach.

Invest in building relationships

The stronger are your work relationships, the easier it is to connect, collaborate and achieve goals. Relationships―built up over time―is the essential ingredient to be influential at work. Building relationships may not sway others to accept your idea, but it will definitely encourage them to give you a fair shot and a listening ear that’s otherwise hard to get.

\ People are more likely to engage with you when they feel a positive connection built using shared values, trust and mutual respect. They are more likely to value your opinions and follow your lead. But doing this takes time. You can’t force or fake your way into it. Manipulating others to like you, respect you or even trust you is short-lived. Others can eventually make out if you were genuine or just faking it.

\ Build trustworthy and long-lasting relationships without the expectation to get something from others.

1. Show interest in others thoughts, ideas and beliefs.
2. Offer support and help when they are struggling.
3. Address misunderstandings openly and respectfully.
4. Appreciate and recognize them for their good work.
5. Be honest and transparent in your interactions.
6. Build trust by being dependable and taking accountability.
7. Respect boundaries and differences in work habits and communication styles.

\ ​​Build an army of informal advocates for your work by gaining trust and respect. Create a foundation so strong that others support amplifies your influence in meetings and decision-making processes.

\

Personal relationships are the fertile soil from which all advancement, all success, all achievement in real life grows.

― Tony Dungy

\ Building rapport plays a significant role in being influential at work. Invest in it. Play a long game.

Summary

1. Influence at work plays a big role in making contributions, doing work that matters and being impactful in your role. Convincing others to your ideas, swaying their thinking to see things your way or aligning them on mutually agreeable goals is a superpower that everyone must work to build.
2. Intent plays a major role in how others perceive you. A positive intent to work together and collaborate can encourage others to seek your opinion while a negative intent can lead to a pushback or just ignore you. Always start with intent. Clearly lay it out in a way that aligns with a common goal.
3. Speaking in a language that others understand or value makes it more likely for them to pay attention to you. To be influential, learn about your audience. Understand what they desire and what matters to them. Adapt your tone, content and conversational style to match their expectations. Make it easy for them to connect and value your perspective.
4. Your knowledge, experience and skills can’t influence others when they don’t know your worth or the value you bring to the table. To be recognized and seen, you have to consciously promote yourself and make your work visible. Don’t hide your talent. Lead from the front, share learnings and help others build valuable skills.
5. When trying to persuade others, think big, but smart small. Break down your thoughts into small ideas and see how you can put forward each one at the right time and moment. Gather feedback, seek inputs and tweak your message to make it easy for others to listen and reach a common conclusion. Celebrate small wins along the way. Small contributions pave the path to bigger and better things in the future by building influence every step of the way.
6. Finally, becoming influential is like running a marathon, it’s not a sprint. Don’t rush through it. Pause and connect with people along the way. Take time to know more about them, seek common interests and build valuable relationships. They will go a long way in getting the support you need.

\ This story was previously published here. Follow me on LinkedIn or here for more stories.

\